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8.22.2005

Land Far, Far Away

It's getting late, almost bedtime - that time when my mind is working faster than anything else, going over the good, the bad and the ugly of my own life. I'm away from my family, away from home and the comforts thereof. Alone with my thoughts, thinking about life and what makes it go 'round. And yeah, I miss them deeply. Two more nights, and I'll be on a flight home. For now, just thinking about how lucky I am, how responsible I need to be, how I don't want to mess this up with so much riding on it.

My role as a dad is huge to me. Of all the hats I wear, "father" is the one that gives me the most reward and the most trepidation. As I read through blogs, I find that there are lots of folks who can look back at a father that either abandoned them, or who made a really neat impression on their lives. There seems to be no in between - either you're a wonderful father or a deadbeat dad.

I want to be a good dad, and I'm hoping the tears and the giggles of my little girl while being so far removed from her daddy show that I am at least trying. Only my kids and I will know, with my wife watching and keeping me straight & encouraged, too. Being a good dad, for me, means training them to make wise choices, more than "here's black-and-white, right-and-wrong". I want them to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humble with God. and I want them to have fun doing it.

It's the most difficult and most satisfying calling of my life.

6 Comments:

Blogger Tana_Schott said...

Well said and well intentioned. As a daughter of a father who wasn't there for me as much as he was there for himself - let me say, you are on your way to fatherhood greatness.

23/8/05 12:22 AM  
Blogger Kim said...

I love being a parent. I think you nailed it when you said it is "the most difficult and the most satisfying calling of my life". Being a mom has been the best thing that's ever happened to me.

Specifically on the topic of fatherhood, my old pastor, Ed Piorek (retired pastor, focuses now only on the ministry) has a ministry focused entirely on the concept of the Father's Love. He speaks of the importance of the role of Dads, and how awesome that God would want us to call Him our Father.

I went on a ministry trip with him once where I was blown away by how many people there were that really needed to hear that simple truth -- the Father Loves You. You can check Ed's message out at "fatherlovesyou.com".

23/8/05 2:37 AM  
Blogger Vicki said...

6:00 am today (after crawling into the bed at 5:00 am-

C:"Mommy, I'll be back in a minute."

Me: Where are you going?"

C: "back over to my room. I need my picture of daddy."

Yeah, you're doing a good job. They want their tickle monster, story reading, praying with them, loving and teaching father home.. and so do I!

23/8/05 6:37 AM  
Blogger Rick said...

just as long as y'all say that while i'm embarrassing her at the mall in front of her friends ;)

23/8/05 6:43 AM  
Anonymous Kelly said...

A daddy and his girl. That is such a defining relationship. Having had a biological father (who was formerly referred to as 'sperm dad' and who we now refer to as 'the guy no longer on the birth certificate') who caused a lot of damage (which you've probably read a little about on the blog), and a dad who adopted me and raised me from the time I was four. I can honestly say that it IS one of the defining relationships in a girl's/woman's life.

And the fact that you're even AWARE that it's an important relationship and making strides and an effort to have a bond and a relationship with your daughter (and son) speaks volumes. My husband, like you, is very thoughful, and very purposeful about the way he thinks about his girls. It's one of my favorite things about him, and I believe will be one their favorite things about him, as they realize not only how much he loves them (because that's obvious), but also just how much he thinks about, prays for and considers them.

23/8/05 6:31 PM  
Blogger Rick said...

the first time i react to seeing underwear show under clothes and go after her with duct tape and a staple gun, you'll back me up, right?

23/8/05 7:22 PM  

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